Man's Not So Best Friend

Now, isn't THIS some sh$t.

Even when a man does an honorable thing, he's still getting run over because of women and man's not so best friend, the U.S. Court system.

Manlaw: If you're going to be a sperm donor, do your homework. Also, don't be generous in Pennsylvania unless you're willing to roll the dice.

As the last line of the article states "About two-thirds of states have adopted versions of the Uniform Parentage Act that can shield sperm donors from being forced to assume parenting responsibilities. Pennsylvania has no such law."

The Donkey Kong

They say kids say the darndest things, but I think mostly that applies to adults. Consider this IM conversation I had with a friend of mine, a 20-sumn editor at a magazine in New York fashion magazine. She's cool with me using this story so long as I don't identify her, and since there are plenty of 20-sumns at Gotham City clothes rags, I think I'm good here.

Anywho, Miss Editor's losing a lil weight, so we're talking about workout programs and the like. The conversation goes:

Miss Editor: I think I may have lost too much weight
KTR: Oh no...you didn't lose the ass did you?

Miss Editor: LOL! People keep saying that...why is that so important?
KTR: Are you serious? Ass is one of the things that makes black women beautiful. Seriously, no homo. I'm not being funny about that, it's just something that tends to be a distinguishing characteristic of a lot of black women.

Miss Editor: So then what's the distinguishing characteristic of black men? Nevermind.
KTR: No, not nevermind. You're the woman, you tell me what the distinguishing characteristic is.

Miss Editor: Honestly, the DONKEY KONG! Seriously. I've been with white men, wasn't feeling it. Even been with an Asian guy, definitely wasn't feeling that....

The "donkey kong"? That's funny enough on its own. But made it hilarious is that this conversation took place as I'm in the middle of reading Scott Poulson-Bryant's HUNG: A Meditation on the Measure of Black Men In America. Hung is Poulson-Bryant's deconstruction of the myth of The Big Black Dick, a treatise of sorts on how the proposition of being labeled physically and metaphorically HUGE by society at large can at once make you a walking threat worthy of lynch-mob justice (Emitt Till), while rendering you nothing more than a plaything in the eyes of a mere horny college girl (Poulson-Bryant himself).

In short, the book's about the fallacy of the black phallus and what that does to those of us who through birth have to carry both the fallacy and the phallus around with us.

Just food for thought.

Wow

Every once in a while, we come across something that just speaks for itself. Today was one of those days.

Six orgasms in 24 minutes...(or "Damn, we really do have to talk to them?")

The medical researcher who discovered women's "g-spots" is out with a new book that says women's brains are the most important organ in achieving orgasm, and not any physical part of the body.

The book is about, simply "The science of orgasm", but in one particularly interesting chapter, she details how some women with spinal injuries could actually relearn how to, well, get off -- in one case to the tune of six (count 'em: six) in a 24 minute span.

I don't know about y'all, but as successful as I like to think I am in the bedroom, six in 24 minutes? The hell kinda hairpin trigger she got? And not for nothing, don't think we men don't understand what this researcher is really trying to accomplish: all of a sudden there's a branch of science "proving" that stimulating a woman's brain really IS the key to everything else. Right, how convenient it is that now there's a way to definitively link actually having to have a conversation with your wife or girlfriend to how well things go later on when you're trying to do anything but talk.

Keep your book, lady.

Condoms, maybe?

File this under "triflin'". According to the Cincinnati Enquirer, a man went to court recently on a theft charge and admitted before a judge that he has six kids -- on the way, that is. That's right. Not six kids already. Not five and one coming. Not even four with twins in the oven.

No, this man -- and ever so loosely do I use the term -- said in open court, prior to his lawyer shutting him up, that he has six different women knocked simultaneously. Surprisingly enough, the cat wasn't even in court for custody or child support. His crime, according to the story, was running a scheme most crooks would know as playing the float. Basically, what you do is make a false deposit at an ATM machine, using an empty envelope, then immediately withdraw the cash back from the account. Because it takes a deposit a certain amount of time to clear, you're off scott free with the cash that you've "floated" yourself, at least until the bank catches its mistake.

I refuse to believe this man was stupid, despite the six kids thing (that's a big exception, I know). For one, a float hustle isn't one for the faint of heart or slight of brain. It takes sense to figure out how to make it work. Beyond that, dude had already made restitution for what he stole, a sign he was smart enough to get ahead of the system and at least try to win himself leniency. As it stands, he took a guilty verdict and walked with not a day behind bars. Last, the story says he produces music and that just got a deal worth at least 300 grand in up-front cash. This is no fool, more like a hustler, and not necessarily of the two-bit variety.

But what doesn't make sense to me is what respectable hustler would set himself up for a trap as big as having six kids by six different babymommas? Seriously, nothing in life could be worse than that, including jail. A man with as many schemes as he had should have been able to figure out a real easy solution to this problem: hit up the Trojan aisle, homie. Trojans ain't never hurt nobody.

We want prenup, we want prenup!

They say stupid is as stupid does, but maybe stupid is as stupid doesn't do.

In this case, stupid is a professional athlete, and what stupid didn't do was get a prenuptial agreement before he tied the knot. Amani Toomer, the New York Giants wide receiver, got divorced yesterday, and avoided what was expected to be a nasty court battle. Good for him, kinda.

The problem is that while he didn't have to go through the hassle of a trial, an annulment, not a divorce, is what he wanted. See, Toomer claimed that his wife was frigid, wouldn't have his babies, had at least four abortions without his knowledge and was generally a basket case after they'd agreed on having a big, happy family before they got married. In Vegas, no less.

His estranged countered that he was unreasonably demanding for sex (because we know how notorious those football players are for their low sex drives. B, please), and that he was holding back her career as a chiropractor and her aspirations to become a lawyer.

My guess is there's probably some truth to both of their claims, but that's beside the point. The real devil in the details here is that the unstated reason Toomer wanted an annulment, rather than a divorce, was to protect his assets. An annulment entitles the ex to little to nothing; in a divorce proceeding, she can get (and she had asked the court for) HALF. I personally will never understand what it is that makes women, men or anyone else feel entitled to half of the assets that they didn't help to build -- last time I checked, I never saw his wife on the field blocking for him -- but again, that's beside the point. At the end of the day, a prenuptial agreement, which doesn't seem to have been in place here, could have prevented all the drama. Outline, in writing, the terms under which both of you are comfortable parting, as well as your expectations for marriage, and you're straight. Never for the life of me will I understand why anyone getting married, pro athletes first among them, doesn't carry one around in their back pocket.

How hard can that be?

Get your wet wipes !

Okay. . .Okay. . .Okay. . .

Let's talk about Lisa Nowak. No, I'm not going to bash her or be insensitive to what people are deeming "mental anguish". We have all wanted to be the object of someone's romantic attention. I mean I remember I was like 20 and I thought my girlfriend was cheating on me. She went out and was calling me drunk saying she would be home late. My "mentally anguished" ass walked about 15 minutes to her crib at 3:00 am to sit between two cars across the street waiting to see who she came home with. Luckily for me it was only 15 minutes away and I'm a man so I didn't see the need to rock a diaper !

First off she's a married mother of 3. So already I'm losing sympathy for her "anguished" ass ! Second, how are you mentally and intellectually fit to be an astronaut but yet drive 900 miles to confront a woman about a man who ain't even yours wearing a diaper. I mean what was she listening to in the whip. How are you driving and just peeing on yourself ? That ain't gangsta ! I know. The astronauts wear diapers for take off and landing. But damn that's exiting and entering a planet's atmosphere. This is driving. Pull your dumb ass over. I'm sorry, I'm bashing.

And. And. She was going to kidnap this chic. She wasn't even sure that homegirl was seeing dude. She just snapped and decided she was willing to risk her husband, 3 children, a career at NASA, and was going to pack a bag, fill up with gas, throw on a diaper and roll out huh ? Just like that ?
Now, was she driving a hybrid cuz what car goes 9 hours w/o a refill ? Why she couldn't piss then ?(ghetto grammar, picture we on the front porch)

She runs up on chic and tries to get in the car then knocks on the window and sprays pepper spray in the window. Oh lawd. This is the best scheme an astronaut could come up with ? And why do people cover their face on the way to court. Don't they know we got the mug shot, we got the name. . .what the hell ?

So now the real question. . .Is she just crazy in love ? or Just crazy ?
I mean I have made women cry. I have caused stress, and probably "mental anguish".
I have had pictures cut up and put in my mailbox ? I've had my house broken into by my woman and I have had a woman follow me home (walking). . .and we were young. I mean it was me and her. Not me and her and her husband and 3 kids. So, what was he doing that she would do some crazy shit like that on a hunch ?

And she's a f#$%in astronaut son. I saw armageddon. The cats go through rigorous training on how to survive in extreme environments. They are supposed to be on some top level mensa sh#t. Suduku ain't sh@t to them. They are supposed to be able to perservere through "mental anguish" not cave in and throw some D (iaper)'s on it and ride out !

All over now travelers will be trying to save time by wearing diapers. F around and see NASA endorsing depends.

"Is your life busy ? Feel like you don't time for sh!t ? Rock depends, handle your business, you can deal with that other sh#t later !"

Manlaw: if you go visit a woman and she has diapers but no kids and no old folks on a bed in the living room. . .RUN !

...to be so lucky

Meet Cindy, my homegirl who moved from Boston to San Diego about a year ago. Cindy's cool people for any number of reasons, but she added one to the list today.

See, Cindy, as she describes it, has the "worst spoiling tendencies" when it comes to her man. Today she's planning a trip for she and her guy to go to Hawaii -- all on her. Let's take a step back for a minute here -- Cindy's no pushover, despite what the name suggests. She's a multiethnic, edgy chic from Dorchester (those of you from Boston will get the implication of that off top), who's petite but with a body, easy on the eyes and soft spoken but who drag races in her spare time and could likely kick the ass of half the men I know my size.

Given that, it was surprising to hear her talking about the fact that outside of racing and her other "normal" exploits, that Cindy also enjoys "...knowing I can splurge on a guy...cooking, baking, and tons of gifts all the time." Makes her feel good, she says. I'll bet it makes him feel good, too.

But it did give me a lot of questions, though. Women my age and younger, at least many of those I've met, ain't exactly what I'd call the "cater to my man" set, regardless of what Beyonce sings about. If they are, it's usually attached to some condition or another, as in 'he's got to prove himself before he deserves, x, y, or z', or 'he's got to be great in bed to deserve breakfast'. Rarely have I heard a woman speak of wanting to spoil a man because of how it made her feel.

Cindy, though, apparently had a better role model than some of the other women I know.

"I learn from my mother, that's how she keeps my dad in love with her
after 34 years. Many women think that they're the ones that need to be
spoiled, but men need affection too. A bj and stuff in the bedroom can
only do so much. Plus, my bf is helpless in the kitchen. I just also
happen to love cooking and baking, it calms me down. It also makes it
easier when I am with a high maintenance guy who loves expensive
clothes, jewelry, cologne, and the occasional getaways. Whenever I go
out with my girls shopping, I always find something for HIM as well. So
for valentine's day, I'm surprising him with a trip to Hawaii, a package
to an all inclusive resort, and some clothes for the vacation."

Ladies, got them notebooks out?

When Sex Goes Wrong on the Net

Steamy Blog Lawsuit Heads for Trial
By MATT APUZZO
AP
WASHINGTON (Dec. 27) - When Robert Steinbuch discovered his girlfriend had discussed intimate details about their sex life in her online diary, the Capitol Hill staffer didn't just get mad. He got a lawyer.
Soon, though, the racy tidbits about the sex lives of the two Senate aides faded from the front pages and the gossip pages. Steinbuch accepted a teaching job in Arkansas, leaving Washington and Jessica Cutler's "Washingtonienne" Web log behind.

While sex scandals turn over quickly in this city, lawsuits do not. Steinbuch's case over the embarrassing, sexually charged blog appears headed for an embarrassing, sexually charged trial.

Lurid testimony about spanking, handcuffs and prostitution aside, the Washingtonienne case could help establish whether people who keep online diaries are obligated to protect the privacy of the people they interact with offline.

Cutler, a former aide to Sen. Mike DeWine, R-Ohio, says she created the blog in 2004 to keep a few friends up to date on her social life. Like a digital version of the sex-themed banter from a "Sex and the City" episode, Cutler described the thrill and tribulations of juggling sexual relationships with six men.

One of those men was Steinbuch, a counsel to DeWine on the Judiciary Committee. Cutler called him the "current favorite" and said he resembled George Clooney , liked spanking and disliked condoms.

"He's very upfront about sex," she wrote. "He likes talking dirty and stuff, and he told me that he likes submissive women."

When Ana Marie Cox, then the editor of the popular gossip Web site Wonkette.com, discovered and linked to Cutler's blog, the story spun out of control. Cutler was fired and Steinbuch says he was publicly humiliated. He went to court seeking more than $20 million in damages.

The case is embroiled in thorny pretrial issues, with each side demanding personal information from the other. Steinbuch wants to know how much money Cutler received from the man she called her "sugar daddy." Cutler demanded Steinbuch's student evaluations from the University of Arkansas at Little Rock Law School, where he teaches.

Steinbuch also recently added Cox as a defendant in the case, though he has not served her with court papers. A trial date has not been set, but Matthew Billips, Cutler's attorney, said there are no settlement talks that might head off a trial.

"I have no idea what he wants," Billips said. "He's never said, 'This is what I think should be done."'

Neither Steinbuch nor his attorney returned phone calls seeking comment. In court, attorney Jonathan Rosen said Steinbuch wants to restore his good name. Students in his legal ethics class all search the Internet and learn about the blog, Rosen said.

"It's not funny and it's damaging," Rosen told a judge. "It's horrible, absolutely horrible."

To win, Steinbuch will have to prove that the details of their sexual relationship were private and publishing them was highly offensive. Billips argues that Cutler never intended to make the blog public but, in the information age, data is easily copied and distributed beyond its intended audience.

If the case goes to trial, its outcome will be important both to bloggers and to people who chronicle their lives on social-networking sites such as MySpace and Facebook. Marc Rotenberg, director of the Electronic Privacy Information Center, said he may teach the Washingtonienne case this spring during his class at Georgetown Law School.

"Anybody who wants to reveal their own private life has a right to do that. It's a different question when you reveal someone else's private life," he said, adding that simply calling something a diary doesn't make it one. "It's not sitting in a nice, leather-bound book under a pillow. It's online where a million people can find it."

Rotenberg asked, what if Cutler had secretly videotaped the encounters and sold the videos without Steinbuch's consent? There has to be a line somewhere, he said.

Since being fired, Cutler moved back to New York, wrote a novel based on the scandal, posed nude for Playboy and started a new Web site, where she solicits donations "for slutty clothes and drugs."

She wouldn't discuss the case but said she's amazed by what has happened.

"The fact that anyone was interested in the first place was a surprise," she said. "The fact that there was a lawsuit in the first place was a surprise. That it's still going on is a surprise."

U.S. District Judge Paul Friedman was surprised, too.

"I don't know why we're here in federal court to begin with," Friedman told attorneys for both sides in April. "I don't know why this guy thought it was smart to file a lawsuit and lay out all of his private, intimate details."

In that sense, the Washingtonienne lawsuit has become a study into when to make a federal case out of something and when to just let it go away. It's a question lawyers wrestle with all the time.

Lanny Davis, the former special counsel to President Clinton who now advises companies during times of crisis, tells clients to decide whether they want justice or simply to set the record straight and get a message across.

"If you're looking for justice, the court system is the only thing you have," Davis said. "If you're looking to get the full story, good and bad, into one coherent narrative, the court system is perhaps the worst possible forum."

Have it your way ?

a quick survey for everyone out there. . .

1. when dating do you date one person at a time ?

2. what are the pro's of dating multiple people simultaneously ?

3. what are the con's ?

Me, I prefer to date one person at a time but I gotta be feeling her and feel like I'm getting what I need in return.

The pros are guarding against developing real feelings. I mean 3 first dates in one month. If you are into variety.

See answer # 2

ps. Women please try to be honest with this. . .I promise I wont use it against you in a court of law !

Dope Sick Love

I was a feind. Became one at 17. She melted my heart instead of cones of ice cream.
Two kids orientated when our friendship was originated then it was like pieces of puzzles, complicated.

I fell in love at 17. I mean fell. On some stomach flippin. nervous, blissfully happy, jr prom, sr prom, and the whole nine. But I didn't understand the moves I was making. I blame it on my pops and my brother. You can expect a 17 to be conscious of self. I didn't become Conscious1 til 25. So, I recently turned 30. Milestone like a muhfucka. Naw. I don't think it's a milestone. No different than Feb 29th this year. I make my own milestones. But back to the topic.

Recently I been headed back to the lab w/o an ass to grab so then I think about all the pals I had. One after another one. I'd touch another one. Then date another one and ask the last if she was done. I get a cravin' like I feind for nicotine but I don't need a cigarette know what I mean ?

I'm feelin dope sick. Detoxing myself from love. I hardened myself and became a cold calculating brother. I been in withdrawal for a decade now. This rehab has not been working. I've tried everything. Clubbin. Alcohol. Tobacco. Crying. Seclusion. Depression. Working Harder. and the list goes on. But I don't get that feeling. I don't smile when a woman I'm dating calls. I don't look at a chic eyeing me and then think about her. I ain't felt no one like that in years. I mean I might smile if I thought I was going to get some. But that ain't all I'm looking for.

They say when a dope head gets out of detox they usually OD cuz they are chasing the feeling they had when they first got high. Which now requires much more dope. I'm chasing that high. I been using. . .but it ain't been the pure ish.

But wait, I got that Kentucky brown, she's giving me that feeling. I'm hot, she is the spoon, and we finna get high off this love.

Because black men read, too....

...We're proud to bring you the inaugural installment of the BML Book Club. Hell, Oprah did it, why can't we? Not to mention, unlike her show, you're more likely to find a rapper on our couch than a serial fabricator. (Take that, Harpo.)

In all seriousness folks, this is one of the new features we're going to do throughout 2007, where periodically we'll post about a book that one or all of us has read or plans to read. It won't be formulaic, as in, "we recommend this book because it meets x, y, and z, criteria"; instead we'll just choose things that we think you should have in your bookshelf (if you don't own enough books to have a bookshelf, stop reading this, open a new tab to Barnes & noble.com, and hit us back up when you do, you illiterate slug) -- either because they're humorous, or thought-provoking or maybe we just liked the picture on the cover.

So without further delay, selection numero uno comes from friends of the BML family. Authors Natalie Moore and Natalie Hopkinson stopped through Boston and showed y'boy PGS and Skinny G some love on the promo tour for their new book, "Deconstructing Tyrone: A New Look at Black Masculinity in the Hip-Hop Generation". I'll be honest: I haven't started reading the book yet because I was forced to put a bow on my copy and stick it under a tree until Christmas Day, but at least I bought one, showed up a the book signing and dragged a photographer from Boston magazine in off the street to give the homegirls some play. Besides, when you get two sistas writing a book that goes beyond the normal bullshit male bashing so common to discussing black males, how can you NOT show love? (Hint: that link above is to the Amazon.com page where you can BUY THE BOOK. Yeah, you. I said "BUY THE BOOK". These girls gotta eat, too.)

Selection number two, for most of you I'm guessing will fall in the category of "Shit I wanted to put in wifey's stocking in place of that Tiffany's bracelet but I didn't have the balls to." Dr. Laura Schlessinger's "The Proper Care and Feeding of Husbands", was first published in 2004, but from the faces of a lot of married cats I see, they should update and re-issue this puppy annually. I'll let the author's own description of the book speak for itself:

"...Women no longer understand their own ability to create the relationships and family life that they truly desire. Years ago women were taught by their mothers that they needed to be wise and sensitive and "work" their men -- —they knew how to create and maintain a happy and well-functioning relationship using their so called "feminine wiles" in benevolent and mutually satisfying ways. Today, women have replaces these feminine wiles with disdain, hypersensitivity, criticism, bullying and nagging...Dr. Laura explains that emotionally men are "simple" creatures and women only need provide such basic necessities as respect, gratitude, food, sex, and some space for "guy time" in order to achieve the happy home they truly desire."

Happy reading.

Too Much Information...

I rarely side with Wendy Williams on a lot of things.

However, I must give her temporary amnesty for this interview with Carmen Bryan. (NSFW - not safe for work...I really mean it).

Seriously, I mean there are so many manlaws in this interview you could fill up a legal sized piece of paper (front and back).

Let's get to the excerpt that made me shudder in my computer chair.

Wendy to Carmen: So, you've slept with guys who have slept...with LOTS of women. You say that you caught one STD. Which strain of STD was it?

Carmen to Wendy: Chlamydia (with a smile on her face)

Wendy turns to Shawn (her studio sidekick): Is Chlamydia curable?

Shawn turns to Wendy: Yeah it is curable.

Wendy turns to Carmen: I knew he would know.

Shawn continues talking to Wendy while she's talking to Carmen:
I've never had it but I know it is curable.

Wendy to Carmen: So is that the only STD you've ever had?

Carmen to Wendy: Yes.

Wendy to Carmen: When is the last time you've had an HIV test?

Carmen: In 1999.

Wendy to Carmen: You haven't slept with anyone since 1999?

Carmen to Wendy: No. I wouldn't say that.

Wendy to Carmen: Were you having unprotected sex?

Carmen to Wendy: On occasion.

Wendy to everyone in the studio: Everybody is burning. E-V-E-R-Y-B-O-D-Y is B-U-R-N-I-N-G. New chairs please.

Wendy finishes this comment as she takes out a can of Lysol and starts spraying in Carmen's direction.

Hence the MANLAW: These days, it is important to know YOUR STATUS. However, it is more important that you know the status of a woman especially if you are going out into the rain without a rain coat. You might catch a cold and that cold might not be curable.

This has been a public service announcement from the brothers at BML.

FUBAR

In military parlance, this means "Fucked Up Beyond All Repair". It's what they say when a tank or some other piece of vital equipment gets blown up or otherwise damaged to the point where it cannot be fixed. Key thing to remember here is that there's a difference between something being FUBAR'd and being completely destroyed; in some ways a FUBAR is worse because the damaged equipment is still laying around, a visual symbol of a major fuck-up.

Ok, so what's this got to do with Manlaw? A lot, because, as men, we've all FUBAR'd a relationship (if you haven't, you've never had a relationship, or you're just perfect, in which case you're not really a man. Real talk.) It could be the aftermath of the one mistake you made that you'll never really be forgiven for, or the cumulative effect of you not taking seriously signs that a woman is getting tired of your bullshit -- until it's too late. In other cases it may not have to do with a woman at all -- any relationship or important connection can be FUBAR'd by mistakes big and small.

So, brothers, we here at Manlaw invite you to tell us about your FUBARs -- share your stories of lost love, like or whatever that you had no choice but to sit and watch as it stood, damaged but beyond your ability to fix. No worries, you can remain anonymous and we promise not to make (too much) fun of your idiocy in ruining a good thing.

What's the world come to?

Every once in a while, man bites dog. Or there's a freak snowstorm in August. Or a black man gets pulled over by cops who don't shoot at him 100 million times when he reaches for his driver's license.

But rarely does a man get over in divorce court. So rare it is, in fact, that when it happens, it's newsworthy: CBS Sportsline reports today that the former tennis great Chris Evert has to pay out $7 million to get unhitched from her husband. Yeah, you read it right -- a judge, in Florida of all places, let a man walk into court with divorce papers and walk out with cash. Her cash. Cats must be barking at dogs today. Pigs flying. Nelly speaking on Spelman's campus.....

What's next, huh? How about a spray-on condom?

So during the day I come across weird stories and this one is no different.

I have no manlaw for this. The piece speaks for itself.

Los Angeles Times
Posted November 30 2006, 2:23 PM EST

BERLIN -- German sex educators plan to launch a spray-on condom tailor-made for all sizes.

Jan Vinzenz Krause from the Institute for Condom Consultancy, a Singen-based practice that offers advice on condom use, said the product aimed to help people enjoy better and safer sex lives.


"We're trying to develop the perfect condom for men that's suited to every size of penis," he said. "We're very serious."

Krause's team (spraykondom.de) is developing a type of spray can into which the man inserts his penis first. At the push of a button it is then coated in a rubber condom.

"It works by spraying on latex from nozzles on all sides," he said. "We call it the '360 degree procedure' - once round and from top to bottom. It's a bit like a car wash."

Krause said the plan is to make the product ready for use in about five seconds. He said it would function more effectively as a contraceptive because it would fit better and not slip.

However, before the new condom can be sold in shops, the firm must ensure that the latex is evenly spread when sprayed, as well as optimise the vulcanization process.

Krause hopes the high tech condom, which will be available in different strengths and colours, will on the market by 2008.

He said the spray can would likely cost some 20 euros ($26) as a one-off purchase. The latex cartridges - sufficient for up to 20 applications - would cost roughly 10 euros, he said.

Krause said he had hit upon the idea when considering the difficulties some people faced using condoms, and drew inspiration from spray-on plasters now used in medicine.

What in the hell....

So yes we have not posted in a while... But today I was fired up so I had to write.
So I went to the lunchroom and my co-workers were at a table discussing things.
So I was told a tale by the female in the group.
She tells me her boyfriend of over a year and half asked for a watch and a suit for Christmas.
She says she will give him the suit but not the watch.
So I say buy that dude his "Cartier".
She says she is not buying the watch because of some old wives tale.
"If you buy a watch, watch him leave you."
I was like what in the hell.
Now full disclosure. My boy had on a watch given by an ex and they broke up.
So then the female goes on by saying, if you get married, all of that goes by the waste side.
I am like is this another way for a woman to get a man to marry them. If that's the case, bump that mess.

MANLAW: When asking for a gift beware of the hidden implications of such a request!

A brief intermission....

Manlaw fam:

We know, we know. Feels like somebody done disappeared us of late. No worries. I can vouch that Marlo, Chris and Snoop don't have us slumped and limed down in a vacant rowhouse.

To the contrary: As hard as we work to be creative and bring you the best of the best when we're writing, we're working harder when we're in the shadows. In other words, don't count us out. We're still around, lurking, plotting, planning, putting the G4 in the hangar and the Maybach 57 in the garage...only so we can ride the 62 out to the tarmac where the G6 is waiting. Mile high club, baby.

So bear with us. We'll be back before you know it, shinin' wit suede muthafuckin Ballys on. In the meantime, relax and enjoy the archive....

Ask Manlaw Part 1

This is the first set of questions sent to brothersmanlaw@yahoo.com. Remember we will not reveal the names of those who submit questions.

Do you feel that a man and a woman can truly be platonic friends despite any lingering attraction?

SPCHRIST response

No. If one party (male or female) thinks the other is attractive...there is always the chance that party will test the curiosity in the future.

SKINNY G response
There will always be a sense of uneasiness when it comes to one party being attracted to a female friend. That party will attempt to gain the attention of the opposite sex by doing things that they would not do with other friends. It can't be a true platonic relationship with those attractive feelings.


Why do you think some women never give "good guys" a chance in favor of the "bad boys"?

SPCHRIST response
If women actually gave "good guys" a chance and stopped chasing "bad boys", they would have absolutely nothing to complain about.

SKINNY G response
I recall when I was a young G in high school and the rep on me was quoted by a female friend about me. "Greg, I could not date you because you are too nice and I would feel bad because I would cheat on you and you would not cheat on me."
I was like what kind of bullcrap is that. So as I got older I also experienced that women are more intreagued by guys who have a sense of excitement. It's usually those guys who live on the edge. But my question is how do you know good guys don't live on the edge too, but it's a different type.
But today I find that as ladies get older they tend to go for less drama after dealing with the wanna be thugs of yesteryear.

Back to the grill again !

You told a tale, okay a personal one, testifying that you are a changed man -- but my question is:

What would you change?


Gooders Girl posed the question. Allow me to answer. I will keep it dating specific as I'm sure you are not interested in a complete life story.

First, I would change the fact that my father never gave me nor my older brother the game. As my role model and the man I trust the most and am closest too, this is who I wanted to help explain the game to me. For this exercise game will be the same as knowledge. Ma Dukes gave me a science book at 11 or 12, every subsequent lesson was self taught or learned through; books, porn, the fuzzy playboy station that we didn't really get, high school peers, experience.

Second, I wish I understood the responsibility of it. Especially emotionally, not only to my self but to the girls involved. My first time was her first time, but for me it was just a conquest because I was tired of being the virgin in the group when the cool guys talked. Her, it was she really liked me. I ended up hurting her because I didn't understand game. She and I are platonic friends now.

I would change my first true love. Well I wouldn't change much. Just the fact that I took it for granted. The fact that I didn't understand that work needed to be done consistently for our love to be maintained. I thought love was self sustaining. It wasn't. She and I were platonic friends before lovers and are platonic friends now after our physical love.

I would change the fact that I took all of my experiences with women and for years used them to exploit their feelings more efficiently. At the same time exploiting my self, my character. I would change the fact that I negatively influenced young men to behave like me and mistreat young women. Hell, occasionally I still catch myself doing it.

I would change. . .now that I think of it. I wouldn't change it for me, because without me walking that path who's to say I would understand the game as I do now. I would change it for a son if God blesses me with one. For a daughter, I would buy a shotgun !

disclaimer: goodersgirl please don't take this post as anymore than me finding your question one that I wished to answer out loud.