So on a recent night I went to a little birthday gathering where I was playing some spades (might I add that the first hand I had was trump tight and we ran a quick 10, then got eight on the next hand. But things went down after that).
But during the course of my playing the game, a separate conversation got my attention.
It was on the topic of women wearing the scare away ring on the left, marriage finger.
Apparantly a sister was wearing a silver ring on the marriage finger.
A fellow brother was wondering if she was married. Hell I looked at her and thought she was married too. But upon closer look at the ring, I knew it was a scare tactic.
One of the first things fellas notice about a woman besides her fine ass body and Gabrielle Union looks is to look to see if she is taken.
So we take our eyes to the left hand side to see if there is a nice little rock on her finger. If not, she is fair game. (But some fellas if the rock is there, it still does not stop them).
But this night the conversation took a spirtual turn. Being that I am a son of a minister, I found one arguement rather interesting.
The comment agreed by a couple of females was that if a man is destined for a woman, a scare away ring would not keep the man from that woman because he would hear from God to step to her.
From the man's point of view, supposed the dude is a newly created believer in God, but sees that ring and is discouraged. A lot of babes in Christ does not know how to hear the voice of God real well. His first instinct is to see the ring and show no disrespect.
As one dude said aptly, the ring is a symbol that God put together to show a Godly union. So why would a guy think that God would want him to disrespct the symbol.
Manlaw: Women, ditch the fake ring because you could be potentially lose a good guy that is possibly destined for you. His respect of the symbol is the type of man you think you want. Yes, we know some ladies wear it because they will meet more asses than not. But is it worth it to get through a lot of asses to get to the one you should be with?
Personally I hate the fake ring because you can begin an encounter with a dude with a lie.
17 comments:
WOW! I do the same thing and used the same rationale when a dude asked me why I wore it if I wasn't married. He told me that it scared any potential good men away. I told him that it didn't scare him because he was talking to me, but if he was the right man God would give him the balls to ask me instead of assuming...then a conversation would ensue.
I know it seems like crazy logic but, I get tired of getting approached by every Tom, Dick and Harry. So, occasionally I wear my ring that really looks like a wedding ring...LOL! Some nights I just want to chill, dance, drink, not give out my number or constantly tell these losers that I have a man just so they can say how good of friend they can be.
Now, normally, i don't wear the ring to house parties or intimate gatherings...usually, just the club...
I don't like anything fake. Fake rings. Fake boobs. ETC. Keep it real and you'll get a real response from me.
V, you're reading it wrong because that is some bullshit. He'll have the courage to come to me and inquire. Most men see the ring and go about their business. This man will at least ask if I'm married and the convo will go from there. I'm the kind of person that believes in things happening for a reason, karma, etc. So...
I never said my logic was without flaw, but it's my logic all the same. And, it works for me. I can go to the club in peace without being hounded...because I am hounded. I don't go out clubbing to meet men, I go to have a good time, party and bullshit. The ring is like cryptonite (sp). I don't want to have my night ruined by some ignant man with a souped up ego that doesn't take no for an answer. This way...I party in peace. If I'm missing out, oh well...As I said before...God will work all that out...
If you think that's some bullshit take it up with the man upstairs...
Dynasty
My question is why would God send you to someone who is faking or lying about something as sacred as marriage?
What G said....But to each his own....
I have an expensive 6 karat ring that I splurged on late last year (and no it's not a diamond, I can't afford no 6 karat diamond!!!) and I wear it on the left as a force of habit, not to mislead or deter guys from talking to me. I recently started either putting it on the right hand or keeping it off alltogether when I hit the streets though because I always get the "are you married?" question from men.
My take is, guys just ASK the woman if she's married or not. Even if you see a ring. It's easy. If she says yes, she's either really married or she doesn't want you. And in that case...FUCK HER and move on.
LMAO!
Skinny, what the hell are you talking about? What out of what I said says that?
I'm not about to keep saying the same thing to keep getting asked the same questions...especially questions that aren't even applicable to what I said...
Whatever. I DEFINITELY wear one. The men in Atlanta can be predatory. And half the time, they STILL don't give a damn!
ATLPredator: So what's up with the left hand? You married or what?
Me: Uh, not yet. But yeah, I've got somebody.
ATLPredator: Aight...well, look, let me give you my number then. Maybe we can be friends until he messes up.
Wearing the decoy diamond can help keep away the riff raff. But I find if they like you, it really isn't going to matter, because they're going to try you regardless!
Con 1: You know me personally and you know that I'm not stuck-up by far. So, talking to an ugly person ain't the problem. I would be a woman without a tongue if I let that be my hang up.
Being attractive is sometimes a burden because men think that means we want all the attention!A big misconception. What kills me is that you men make it sound like we have to talk to you just because you said something to us. We don't owe you shit. If I don't want to be bothered then dammit leave me alone.
I think that you all are blowing the God reference out of perportion and twisting it's meaning...be it on purpose or because you stopped reading the statement after that. Nevertheless, the fact still remains that some men are like blood sucking leeches forcing women to think of creative ways to divert their advances.
I still don't think there is anything wrong with a man asking me if I'm married because I'm not. I'm not talking about if I hypothetically was...I'm not. You are the same men that said closed mouths don't get fed.
Fuking Hypocrites...
That whole, God and destiny thing is a load of ....
And I say that because if you are so on this God tip and Holy, etc then there is no need for the fake ring. You are lying and who would want to be apart of that. And why are you going to involve God into your lie.
Come on people! Stop using God to your convenience!
SO we should give everybody a fair chance?
IN life, you try to give people a chance, but you should still do it with a weary eye.
That fake ring thing is full of bullshit. If you have to pretend/be fake/ and front then you dont deserve a good man, you deserve the riff raffs that apporach.
um... i don't think its normal to wear a fake ring. just say no.
I understand all the points that you guys are making, and I respect them. However, I agree most with Hizzle06..I'm from the south where dudes could give two pennies less whether or not your married. The ring doesn't even detour them from asking "Hey whats up with the ring". If it's there, then why ask?? If I see anything that looks like potential then I take it off and put it on another finger. Its just that some guys are predators and you can't BE TOO CAREFUL, especially being a single woman. I only where it, case and point, when I am at the club, or I really don't feel like being bothered, but it really doesn't matter bc if they really are headstrong in approaching me, they are going to do so anyway.
Regarding Dynasty's original comments, I can understand trying to get a little peace, but God is not going to tell any man or woman who is in tune with God, to approach someone who is already wearing a symbol of eternal unity (i.e. wedding band)....
Post a Comment