New Dating philosophy?

I saw the following passage about a guy posted on a message board. Funny story and a lesson for the ladies out there.

-- MY DATE LAST NIGHT ---

When I did my taxes this year I found out that I spent over $14,000 on Dates last year. Most of that was spent on dinner and drinks in Manhattan. Now don't get me wrong, I had some very good times, some great sex, some good conversations. Hell, I even made a good friend along the way, but mainly I came away from the date feeling extremely disappointed and with a lighter wallet. Date by date it's not THAT much money but it all adds up fast!

In the past I had a habit of always grabbing the check and paying whether my date was hot or not. Whether we clicked or not. Basically I felt ashamed to let her pay. I also kept and interesting statistic and ev en I was surprised that only 5% of my dates even offered to pay - yes you see that right- 5%! One girl in the entire year offered to pay for the entire check. A very nice gesture. But of course I paid and doubt she was sincere. In light of all this evidence I knew I had to change some things. So, this year.....

I DECIDED TO NEVER PAY FOR A FIRST DATE AGAIN. How did I do this? First adopted the mindset that a girl should naturally assume she's paying for herself. Now this wasn't easy at first but I quickly got used to it. Then when going into the bar/restaurant/lounge etc. I would hand the server a credit card and ask them to open tabs for us. HEY!-Did you catch that? I said 'TABS.' Yah, don't worry at least 95% of the girls I meet miss that one too. Just to make sure I usually confirm that the server has understood me too. I do this when the date rudely answers her cell phone or is in the bathroom (probably using her cell phone). Guys, you know the Mastercard "priceless" serie s of commercials? Well, let me tell you, you won't understand the meaning of 'priceless' until you see one of these girls handed their own check for 3 20$ martinis and overpriced food (that they would probably never buy on their own). It's also very relaxing to encourage the girl to eat and drink up because even at 20$ a pop for exotic gooey blender drinks I could care less how many of them she has - cause SHE'S PAYING.

Oddly enough when she realizes that there are individual bills there will a few prolonged moments of discomfort. But don't panic. Something that took me by surprise is how many girls suddenly have to 'go to an ATM'. I can't quite figure out if it's because their cc's are maxed out on shoe purchases or that they are trying to guilt me into paying. Well, probably a combination of both, but I'm remorseless after doing this for nearly 3 months now. Which brings me to my date last night...... omg.....

Of course the classy nice Irish pub I suggested w asn't good enough for her. Nah...she needed to go somewhere more trendy. Ok, no problem. W? Hudson? Meatpacking Dist? SoHo? Where we going? So she picks a midtown hotel bar. Nice place. Little stuffy. Drinks, not bad and Macadamia nuts on the lounge tables (complimentary) nice! Of course I went thru my usual routine, handed the server a credit card asked her if we can start tabs she said, 'sure' and took the card. 1 drink in her cell phone rang. She apologized, (she had to get it). So I moved into confirmation mode. Our waitress even missed the 'tabs' part but she adjusted on the fly and told me no problem. Boy, let me tell you - the girl i was with could really throw down the drinks. She was drinking scotch that was older than the hotel we were in. Of course I encouraged her the whole way. She was like, wow they have Johnny Walker BLUE label! I was like, 'you ever try it?' She's like....'Nooooooo!!!' I'm like, 'go on....just get some'. She's like 'are you sure'. I'm like, 'look, if you want it, just get it!' So she ordered one, then another, and finally one more..... wow she was probably more than a little drunk. I stuck to my Stoli and a splash of Cran.

When the BILL(S) came she sobered up fast. I caught a glimpse of hers, 5 drinks plus a little finger food $319.00 I think it was. She looked shocked and sick to her stomach when she saw 2 bills. Guess she thought I was buying. Think again. (The old me woulda soaked up the bill but steered her away from the Blue) I had 4 drinks, no food and a great buzz. Pricey Stoli, but overall still a good value (i ate a ton of free macadamias and almond ds) $36.00. Damn I thought, that BLUE label will get you every time. Of course she did more than the traditional fumble through her purse. Her face was beat red and she was speechless. She left the bill on the table and excused herself for the restroom. I had already paid and was sucking on some ice. The waitress was looking concerned. I told her, 'look'. Sure enough my date was heading out toward the front door. I slowly grabbed my coat as the waitress ran after her. Then security or a bellman grabbed her at the door and a small shouting match ensued. Can you imagine, she was trying to leave - without paying!

Well, I didn't stick around to see what happened. All I saw was the poor waitress standing just inside the front door with a small coctail tray. she did look concerned but not panicked. A doorman and bell hop had the girl by the arm, outside and was semi-forcing her back inside, she wasn't getting away from this bill. I paid my bill. I had my receipt. But I couldn' t help wondering why she ordered 3 Johnny Walker Blues, doesn't she know that shit is expensive? Then I wondered if they had to arrest her while I had another drink at my local Irish pub.

I haven't heard from her again. Too bad, she was pretty cute too...


Hence the manlaw: The ladies will get mad because it was a situation where a woman tried to get over on a guy and got PLAYED herself. The telling sign was the walk or sprint of shame to the door, when she she knew damn well she didn't have any cash or the means to pay for the outrageous stuff SHE ordered.

Who the fawk goes out (male or female) and doesn't have ANY MONEY or at least a credit card on them in case of emergency? And if you know you don't have any loot, why are you ordering enough grub and drank to feed an army? That's a terrible upbringing if she was told that a child and even worst if this was reinforced as a young adult.

It tells me she wasn't interested in getting to know the guy, or anyone for that matter, at all...it was all about her "getting something" out of it. What if he walked out on her and left her sitting at the table? What would she have done then? Has dating really deteriorated to this? Do women really calculate in their mind "how much they can squeeze out of a guy on a date?" This gimme mentality has to go...in 2009.

Bottom line.

1) You never assume anything.
2) You always let someone order for themselves.
3) If you don't have MONEY and this goes to ladies too...stay home. Or if you really want to go out, state that you have no money before we agree on plans.

Personally, there wouldn't have been a date if she tried to run this scam on me. The second she mentioned something that was 180 degrees different than what I suggested, it would have been a wrap for me.

Till Adultery Do Us Part?

Suspended sentence for thespian Korean adulteress Ok So-Ri

Article from: Agence France-Presse
A LEADING South Korean actress who unsuccessfully challenged a national law which criminalises adultery has been given a suspended jail sentence for her extra-marital affair.

Ok So-Ri, 40, was sentenced by a district court on Wednesday after the constitutional court in October rejected her petition against the decades-old law.

Ok had admitted having an affair with a pop singer but blamed it on a loveless marriage to actor husband Park Chul, who had sued her and two of her alleged lovers. She had argued that the law infringed the right of individual choice in sexual relations. But the constitutional court ruled that adultery should remain a crime punishable by jail. It was the fourth time the court had refused to overturn the legislation, introduced in 1953. Ok was given a suspended eight-month jail term by the court in Goyang city, 30km northwest of Seoul.

"Committing adultery with an acquaintance of the spouse is something to be denounced. However, the accuser (Park) should also be blamed for being negligent in family life," the court said in a statement."It should also be taken into account that the accused, a celebrity whose private life has been laid bare to the public, has suffered enough pain."

The 38-year-old pop singer, who was not publicly identified, received a suspended six-month jail sentence.Ok's petition rekindled debate over whether adultery should be a crime punishable by up to two years in jail.

Some women's groups contend the law must be maintained to protect female rights in a traditionally male-dominated society. Critics say it breaches an individual's right to sexual choice and is outdated. Some lawmakers are pushing for a bill to repeal the legislation. The law is usually invoked only when a husband or wife complains of a partner's adultery. He or she must follow up the complaint by filing for divorce.

According to a survey quoted by newspapers last year, nearly 68 percent of South Korean men and 12 percent of women confessed to having sex outside marriage. Court data shows the number of people jailed for adultery has declined sharply over the years. Last year, 1,190 people were indicted but only 47 were jailed and 592 were given suspended sentences.

http://www.theaustralian.news.com.au/story/0,25197,24813882-2703,00.html

Manlaw: Let me first say that this is a fawked-up law in South Korea. With that said, O.K. So-Ri and any male that voilates this law should be lucky the penalty isn't castration. See, if that was the penalty, I think adultery would be WAY down (no pun intended). But the interesting stat is the survey done by South Korean newspapers that said "nearly 68 percent of South Korean men and 12 percent of women confessed to having sex outside of marriage." Now, you know someone is lying here and when there is such a disparity in the polling, I am throwing the dirt on the women. These men are not cheating by themselves. Women have much more incentive to lie about sex than men so they will not be seen as loose. To correct this irregularity, you should multiply the women's precentage by at least 3 to bring it to 36 percent. That's more believable.

The New 50-50

http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/asia-pacific/7661786.stm
Cambodian couple cut home in half

Mr Rim's half of the house has been moved to an undisclosed location
An estranged couple in Cambodia have sawn their house in half to avoid the country's convoluted divorce process.
Moeun Rim and his wife, Nhanh, who have been married nearly 40 years, split the building last week following an argument, local officials said.
Mr Rim has removed his share of the property and the couple have also divided their land into four parts; two for their children, and two for them.
Divorce cases in Cambodia can be costly and may take a long time to settle.
The house - or one half of the house - is located in Prey Veng province, about 90km (56 miles) from the capital, Phnom Penh.

In sickness and health

The couple fell out after Mr Rim accused his wife of neglecting him whilst he was ill.
"We tried to persuade them to think clearly before they did this because they had been married for nearly 40 years," local chief Vorng Morn told the Phnom Penh Post newspaper.
"But they did not listen," he said.
A local lawyer told the newspaper that dividing a property was legal if both parties had agreed to it - but that it did not mean the pair were legally divorced.
"If in the future they have any disagreements, the provincial chief will not be responsible, as there had not been a judgment from the court," Prak Phin said.

P.S. a.k.a "the manlaw"

This gives a new definition to the phrase "50-50" and it better not catch on in the United States. Always judge a relationship by the bad times and how she's able to deal with it. Once you have your answer, then you'll know if you need to cut your loses in half and be done with it.

The new punishment for not doing housework?

A 20-year-old Fort Worth, TX woman will have a lot of explaining to do before a judge after she's accused of an aggravated assault charge after police say she bit her boyfriend, broke a picture frame across his face and swung at him with a sword during an argument about him not doing the dishes.

You know this didn't start and most likely will not end (that's if he's not dead next time) with the dishes. This woman has ISSUES and it most likely has nothing to do with him. He probably isn't a saint either but when you bite someone, break a picture frame across someone's face and swing a sword...YOU ARE TRYING TO CAUSE unrepairable damage.

Hence the manlaw: There is no honor is getting beat up by your girlfriend and for god's sake move out of the way or at least duck the next time she goes on a war path. Unless the girlfriend is an Olympic gold medalist in wrestling, softball or fencing, a healthy male should be able to fend off a woman. Either that or hit the gym. Sheeesh.

Caught With Your Pants Down...

This appeared on Craig's list and I have to give a fist pound to the woman that obviously wrote the following item.

Found : Your Panties (Please Come Get Them) (222 Curlew St, Rochester, NY 14613)

---

Reply to: comm-821755873@craigslist.org ^[?]
Date: 2008-09-01, 1:40AM EDT


Found:

Hi. I found your panties and I was wondering if you want them back. You left them at my house between August 18 and August 23 while I was in the hospital delivering my son. I don't know who you are, but obviously you know my husband.

Anyways, I would like you to come and get them. I am not going to assault you or threaten you, or say or do anything against you, this is obviously my husband's wrong doing. I'm honestly not even sure that you knew he was married. He might have even told you some BS story just to get into your panties...which you forgot to take with you.

For all of you reading this who think it is a joke, I assure you that it is not. My husband, however finds it to be a hoot. He even tried to tell me that they must be mine and I am mistaken. This is not the case. First off, I have bought all of my own underwear, so I know what I own. Secondly, I have not worn panties in this size for 2 years, so I am sure that I would vividly remember seeing them in my underwear drawer for 2 years. Third, if they were mine, being that they are too small, they would not have ended up in my laundry because I would not be able to wear them.

If you are not sure that they are yours, I have attached a photo and will leave a description of the panties below. No explanation on your part is required, but if you are interested in testifying in court to pay him back for treating you like a piece of meat, I am happy to oblige you, it is your choice. If these are your panties, please e-mail me and I will give you the address you can pick them up at, though I'm sure you all ready know it.

Specs on Said Panties:

*Size 6

*Magenta fabric with black stitching around the gathering on the lower half.

"Love and Kisses" applique on the front in light pink and black

Small silver heart charm attached to black bow on the front, center.

My husband wanted to keep them, but I managed to pull them from his grasp after I threw them at him. I figure someone might want them back. Again, no explanation on your part is necessary. If you want, I will even mail them to your address or your friend's address so that you don't have to meet me. They are even freshly washed, since I did not notice them until I took them out of the dryer tonight with a load of my laundry.

Thanks!

Sometimes a manlaw writes itself: The guy indirectly mentioned in this post needs to turn in his player card IMMEDIATELY. He shouldn't pass Go and he damn sure isn't collecting $200 (he's probably going to pay 10 times that in a divorce settlement. If he was that careless to leave incriminating evidence around...then he deserves whatever punishment his wife dishes out.

Black is Beautiful..

And Susan Crain Bakos wrote an essay about it.

Like to read it? Here you go...

You have to give it to her because she does bring up some interesting points.

Wingman Rules!

My boy Jesse broke this down recently to myself and some other fiends and I felt it was my civic duty to disseminate his manifesto to America.

=======================================================

Ok....we know the ladies have mastered the arts of having their Wingpersons...be he gay man, lady friend, or Mother Hen types, they WILL ruin the fun for everyone because you don't deviate from the plan that was agreed upon when everyone was less horny and drunk. But we men have allowed homophobia and cuckolding women to break up the bond and merit of the beloved "wingman."

I'm reminded of the old Bud Light commercial with the two brothers on a double dinner date when another honey catches one's eye. For those who don't know the Wingman has a different responsibility than the Wingwoman.

Therefore I feel it's my responsibility to offer a refresher course and outline the rules.

WINGMAN RULES


1) It's best to establish before going out who is to "take one for the team" or who is "overdue" for his Leadman role.

2) The Wingman is a mutual role for all parties involved. Unless agreed upon before hitting the scene, whomever gets the hookup first (Leadman), the other(s) must collectively support Leadman until the mission is accomplished.

3) Leave your heart at home. If you're thinking about a lost or distant love, suck it up and be a Wingman to your boy!

4) No cock blockin'! If you're boy already has an in with a lady you've had an eye on, you have 2 options; A) let your boy know and leave it up to HIM to step back (no forcing him to) or B) stick to your duties as a Wingman and act faster next time.

SETTING UP

1) If the decision is made that a spokesperson from the group is to introduce you to the cutie (clearing the brushes if you will), the lead man is NOT, repeat NOT to make eye contact or ever look in the general direction of target until the spokesperson returns. Leadman/Setup should busy himself in convincing conversation...preferably with a woman. Exceptions to the "return" rule include the phone text or another Wingman giving him the "clear."

2) Once the Leadman has an in, the others must do what's necessary to keep things on track. Once Leadman is set, next Leadman is given support.

Group Guys & Group Ladies Mingle:

1)Under NO circumstances are any two couples to hold a private conversation. Two couple break off are the minimum group reduction.

2)Women will find weak Wingman and cause him to divulge the group's weakness, shattering everyone's prospects once word reaches Mother Hen. Answer and/or avoid personal questions about you or wing men accordingly when on the dance floor.

3)NEVER answer a question about your boy unless it's a 100% positive image answer. Questions about other Wingman are answered ONLY in the paired up couple or group presence.

4)Never bicker about money or who is picking up the tab in front of the ladies. Cover your broke ass wingman and cash him out later!

5)Never flash cash in front of the ladies.

Disseminating Information:

1) Always check your Wingman for the grooming keys regularly: hair, collar, fly, breath, sweat, straight clothing. Bring it to their attention ASAP and as discreetly as possible!

2) Children, marriage, pregnancies, smoking, ugly feet, bad breath, bulge between legs, Adam's apple, bad teeth, man hater, possible lesbian, stuffed bras, and weaves should be brought to the attention of ALL members ASAP!! Especially the Leadman. If he looks bad, everyone looks bad! *see below on ABORT PROTOCOL*

3) Needless to say, while looking out for what you like, if you catch a honey eying your boy, you let him know.

4) Always share the eye candy love. Hoggin' up the long legs, Dancefloor Queen, braless honey, or jigglin' butt will get your wings clipped and or "set up" with a #2.

5) NEVER point, provide GOOD landmarks. "9 o'clock in red dress about 5' 7"" Making your boy(s) look all over the place makes the whole group look bad and hungry. Exception to the pointing rule is when a "quick look or miss it " reaction is needed. Do NOT abuse this exception.

ABORT PROTOCOL:

1) Choosing to abort an ongoing "get to know" MUST have agreed approval of at least 2 Wingman before initiating. This is to confirm that reasons for aborting are within the rules of engagement and/or weighed against the potential and likely results of continuing engagement.

2) Abort Level is to be determined 1) GET HIM OUTTA THERE ASAP 2) He's been over there long enough, save that for getting to know later b/c we have bigger fish to fry OR we got a better hook up for him 3) Bring it to his attention and let him make his own decision.

3) The Wingman currently not engaged in a "fast track" conversation with a woman, is to do whatever is necessary to bring the information and recommendation of the group to the Leadman without causing a scene.

PRESENCE

1) make sure each and every pose you hold says MAN. Just like when dancing, never have your arms or hands looking restless.

2) Give your boys room. This ain't Football, no need to huddle. Plus real men take up space they don't need even in a crowd, cuz who's gonna tell them they can't? NO ONE that's who!

3) No staying together for more than 5 min. Good conversation or not, just as lead conversation is to be shared, so is the "lookout" role. Share the responsibility of being the "one" who ventures out to the "chickenhead" cluck group gathered up in the corner or by the bar. Every once in a while, just straight break up and scout the place.

Fellas.....anything I miss?

Wifey Material: How Do You Stack Up?

No. 1 Quality Men Want in a Wife
(from aol.com)

Filed under: Attraction & Chemistry, Friends & Family, Dating, Commitment & Marriage


The adage is true: Men tend to marry a woman who is like their mother.

We're not talking looks or personality. It's even bigger than that. We're talking life direction. Whether a young man's mother earned a college degree and whether she worked outside the home while he was growing up seems to have an effect years later when he considers his ideal wife, according to a study by University of Iowa sociologist Christine Whelan, author of "Why Smart Men Marry Smart Women."

High-achieving men, that is those who earn salaries in the top 10 percent for their age and/or have a graduate degree, are highly likely to marry a woman whose education level mirrors their mom's.

Nearly 80 percent of the high-achieving men whose mothers had college degrees married women with college degrees, and 19 percent of them married women with graduate degrees. Of men whose moms had graduate degrees, 62 percent tied the knot with graduate degree holders, and 27 percent said "I do" to women with college degrees.

Sixty-eight percent of high-achieving men agreed with the statement, "Smart women make better mothers."

"Successful men in their 20s and 30s today are the sons of a pioneering generation of high-achieving career women. Their mothers serve as role models for how a woman can be nurturing and successful at the same time," said Whelan, a visiting assistant professor of sociology in the UI College of Liberal Arts and Sciences. "One man I interviewed put it like this: 'If your mother is a success, you don't have any ideas of success and family that exclude a woman from working.'"

Fun facts about men and their mothers:

-- 72 percent of mothers of high-achieving men worked outside the home after they had children.

-- Among those men, 75 percent agreed or strongly agreed with the statement "Men are more attracted to women who are successful in their careers."

-- Men who grew up with working moms were almost twice as likely to marry a woman who makes $50,000 or more per year.

-- 62 percent of high-achieving single men disagreed with this statement: "Women who are stay-at-home parents are better mothers than women who work outside the home."

-- 75 percent of the high-achieving men disagreed with this statement: "It is usually better for everyone involved if the man is the achiever outside the home and the woman takes care of the home and family."

"These young men saw their mothers as smart women who could choose to work outside the home, and now that they're making decisions about what they want in a wife, it seems that they are choosing similar types of women," said graduate student Christie Boxer, who assisted with the research.

Manlaw: Ladies get to know a man's mother very closely. He might not admit this to your face but in some way he's comparing you to his mother to see how you stack up.

Who wants to be a millionaire? (Part 2)

Lisa Miceli is tarnishing the reputation of goldiggers.

She's already struck out twice on paternity tests with my man Michael Jordan and now she has the balls to ask him for a THIRD paternity test.

Umm...Michael finally said it is time to play some defense and sued her for harassment. That's probably the best defensive move Michael has made in a long time.

But serioulsy, how many times do you have to embarrass yourself?

What Black Men Think!

This was a very good PSA.

Why You Should Avoid Dating Single Mothers!

I can't say I agree with every thing said here, but the man does make some valid points.

I've never dated a single mother myself but I'll have to reference the checklist if I ever come across one soon.