Tuesday, September 09, 2008

Caught With Your Pants Down...

This appeared on Craig's list and I have to give a fist pound to the woman that obviously wrote the following item.

Found : Your Panties (Please Come Get Them) (222 Curlew St, Rochester, NY 14613)


Reply to: comm-821755873@craigslist.org [?]
Date: 2008-09-01, 1:40AM EDT


Found:

Hi. I found your panties and I was wondering if you want them back. You left them at my house between August 18 and August 23 while I was in the hospital delivering my son. I don't know who you are, but obviously you know my husband.

Anyways, I would like you to come and get them. I am not going to assault you or threaten you, or say or do anything against you, this is obviously my husband's wrong doing. I'm honestly not even sure that you knew he was married. He might have even told you some BS story just to get into your panties...which you forgot to take with you.

For all of you reading this who think it is a joke, I assure you that it is not. My husband, however finds it to be a hoot. He even tried to tell me that they must be mine and I am mistaken. This is not the case. First off, I have bought all of my own underwear, so I know what I own. Secondly, I have not worn panties in this size for 2 years, so I am sure that I would vividly remember seeing them in my underwear drawer for 2 years. Third, if they were mine, being that they are too small, they would not have ended up in my laundry because I would not be able to wear them.

If you are not sure that they are yours, I have attached a photo and will leave a description of the panties below. No explanation on your part is required, but if you are interested in testifying in court to pay him back for treating you like a piece of meat, I am happy to oblige you, it is your choice. If these are your panties, please e-mail me and I will give you the address you can pick them up at, though I'm sure you all ready know it.

Specs on Said Panties:

*Size 6

*Magenta fabric with black stitching around the gathering on the lower half.

"Love and Kisses" applique on the front in light pink and black

Small silver heart charm attached to black bow on the front, center.

My husband wanted to keep them, but I managed to pull them from his grasp after I threw them at him. I figure someone might want them back. Again, no explanation on your part is necessary. If you want, I will even mail them to your address or your friend's address so that you don't have to meet me. They are even freshly washed, since I did not notice them until I took them out of the dryer tonight with a load of my laundry.

Thanks!




Sometimes a manlaw writes itself: The guy indirectly mentioned in this post needs to turn in his player card IMMEDIATELY. He shouldn't pass Go and he damn sure isn't collecting $200 (he's probably going to pay 10 times that in a divorce settlement. If he was that careless to leave incriminating evidence around...then he deserves whatever punishment his wife dishes out.

4 comments:

Anonymous said...

So sad... That should have been in the trash or something as soon as ol' girl left!!

LaPreghiera said...

How tacky. He deserves whatever happens for the simple fact he dared put another person who is not immediate kin's drawers in with the laundry. The vagina is considered the cleanest orifice on a healthy woman's body, but the anus is the exact opposite. Those panties been up against the other woman's butt all day and now that is mixed in with your clothes. Onery!
The wife told the honest truth, we can identify every pair of panties we own, even growing up in a house full of girls you know whose are whose, or at least which aren't yours. Panties are like toothbrushes, you are not suppose to share! If there is ever any ambiguity, they go in the trash or stay untouched til claimed.

Sherlon Christie said...

@epsilonicus...I totally agree.

@athena nike...Yeah...homeboy was sloppy with a capital "S". lol @ "we can identify every pair of panties we own, even growing up in a house full of girls you know whose are whose, or at least which aren't yours."

Wow. I didn't think it was that serious...but I guess so.

LaPreghiera said...

Yes, its deep for women. Have to do the drawerology topic one day