THIS APPEARED ON CRAIG'S LIST -- THE RESPONSE IS PUUUUUURE GENIUS.
What am I doing wrong?
Okay, I'm tired of beating around the bush. I'm a beautiful (spectacularly beautiful) 25-year-old girl. I'm articulate and classy. I'm not from New York. I'm looking to get married to a guy who makes at least half a million a year. I know how that sounds, but keep in mind that a million a year is middle class in New York City, so I don't think I'm overreaching at all.
Are there any guys who make 500K or more on this board? Any wives? Could you send me some tips? I dated a business man who makes average around 200 - 250K. But that's where I seem to hit a roadblock. 250,000 won't get me to central park west. I know a woman in my yoga class who was married to an investment banker and lives in Tribeca, and she's not as pretty as I am, nor is she a great genius. So what is she doing right? How do I get to her level?
Here are my questions specifically:
- Where do you single rich men hang out? Give me specifics- bars, restaurants, gyms
- What are you looking for in a mate? Be honest guys, you won't hurt my feelings
- Is there an age range I should be targeting (I'm 25)?
- Why are some of the women living lavish lifestyles on the upper eastside so plain? I've seen really 'plain jane' boring types who have nothing to offer married to incredibly wealthy guys. I've seen drop dead gorgeous girls in singles bars in the east village. What's the story there?
- Jobs I should look out for? Everyone knows - lawyer, investment banker, doctor. How much do those guys really make? And where do they hang out? Where do the hedge fund guys hang out?
- How you decide marriage vs. just a girlfriend? I am looking for MARRIAGE ONLY.
Please hold your insults - I'm putting myself out there in an honest way. Most beautiful women are superficial; at least I'm being up front about it. I wouldn't be searching for these kind of guys if I wasn't able to match them - in looks, culture, sophistication, and keeping a nice home and hearth.
* it's NOT ok to contact this posterwith services orother commercial interests
Disclaimer: Sometimes a manlaw writes itself...like this guy did with his response. lol.
PostingID: 432279810
THE ANSWER
Dear Pers-431649184:
I read your posting with great interest and have thought meaningfully about your dilemma. I offer the following analysis of your predicament. Firstly, I'm not wasting your time, I qualify as a guy who fits your bill; that is I make more than $500K per year. That said here's how I see it.
Your offer, from the prospective of a guy like me, is plain and simple acr@ppy business deal. Here's why. Cutting through all the B.S., what you suggest is a simple trade: you bring your looks to the party and I bring my money. Fine, simple. But here's the rub, your looks will fade and my money will likely continue into perpetuity...in fact, it is very likely that my income increases but it is an absolute certainty that you won'tbe getting any more beautiful!
So, in economic terms you are a depreciating asset and I am an earning asset. Not only are you a depreciating asset, your depreciation accelerates! Let me explain, you're 25 now and will likely stay pretty hot for the next 5 years, but less so each year. Then the fade begins in earnest. By 35 stick a fork in you!
So in Wall Street terms, we would call you a trading position, not a buy and hold...hence the rub...marriage. It doesn't make good business sense to "buy you" (which is what you're asking) so I'd rather lease. In case you think I'm being cruel, I would say the following. If my money were to go away, so would you, so when your beauty fades I need an out. It's as simple as that. So a deal that makes sense is dating, not marriage.
Separately, I was taught early in my career about efficient markets. So, I wonder why a girl as "articulate, classy and spectacularly beautiful"as you has been unable to find your sugar daddy. I find it hard to believe that if you are as gorgeous as you say you are that the $500K hasn't found you, if not only for a tryout.
By the way, you could always find a way to make your own money and then we wouldn't need to have this difficult conversation.
With all that said, I must say you're going about it the right way. Classic "pump and dump."I hope this is helpful, and if you want to enter into some sort of lease, let me know.--
9 comments:
I'm going to play devil's advocate for anyone who's going to pounce on this woman's morals or lack thereof. Sounds like someone conditioned her to think that way. Coincidentally, she's a carbon copy of what most rich men prefer. An armpiece, but not a substantial mouthpiece. Some women have been taught that a hot body, domestic skills and good sex are enough to keep a man. Just listen to Beyonce's "Upgrade U". But what this woman is missing is that even if she scores this wuss, which is exactly what she'll get. She's buying some things she can't afford. Things like his disrespect for her, his cheating eye once her appeal wears off and his mental abuse when she can't adjust to his world emotionally. While some men may prefer to "lease" women like these, they tend to get more trouble than they can afford. Just ask any celebirty athlete.
@reinestorm....interesting point of view.
I loved this. The response to that was classic!!!
You know, he still didn't answer one very interesting question. So is he saying that the guys who marry the "plain-looking" women already know what they're getting? So they don't worry about "depreciating looks"? Or do they assume that all beautiful women have this mentality and steer clear of them?
I was with her up until the salary requirement. I've seen maniuplative, down-right evil females, constantly-cheating on their men females, and what some called a "treasure troll" or "alien-looking" female get and keep men, yet some of us can't to save our lives.
Answer that brothersmanlaw.
OK. I admit it. I wrote the reply to this woman. Call me a dog, if you will, but that's what I am. (At least I'm a truthful dog)
loved every second of the response. Don't ask for something you can't offer in return.
It wasn't that he addressed other men and "plain" looking women. He was talking about her and those like her. In any other case if there isn't a salary expectation then there wouldn't be a bunch of other constrictive expectations either.
@epsilonicus...the best response not written by an official member of the BML crew.
@journiemajor...we obviously disagree on this post.
@tupac and @chris and @amadeo...lol
I have not a thang to say about this ... other than, HILARIOUS. Ole dude put it all into perspective for her, FORREAL!
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